I Want to Believe...

I want to believe that I am on the right path,

That every intention is sincere,

That every moment has purpose.

I want to believe that people are intrinsically good,

That the Universe has lessons that will better our existence,

That with these lessons we become better people, better friends, better partners.

I want to believe that I am good,

That I have something to offer that is more than just the surface,

That the reality of my existence lies beneath the paint and the words.

But before I can believe all these things, I have to be judged,

I have to make myself vulnerable, expose my heart, take off the mask,

In reality, I have to set aside my expectations because...

Because life does not show you good without the bad,

You cannot know love without rejection,

You cannot be free without letting go.

So I will let myself go and forgive the anger,

I will dry the tears that well up when I think that I have lost,

The emotion that stirs when I feel slighted and rejected.

I will let go of the pretense and the games,

I will let go of the disbelief and the negativity,

And in the process I will find myself.

© Millie Donovan